Just last night the painful topic came to the surface again. Cameron had spent a while in New York and learned that his friend is friends with a young, Japanese professional violinist. He wondered whether she was the same violinist, as he put it, whose career I was "following." This of course was a euphemism for "stalking." For those of you who haven't been following my blogs for long enough you might want to catch up with the following post: She's Playing me Like a Violin.
At the conclusion of the blog I wrote how I would be in an everlasting state of turmoil knowing that the moment I gave up hope my next email would arrive. This knowledge would prevent me from ever entirely losing hope because of her history of always surprising me after all hope was lost. Therefore I was stuck in a Catch-22 unable to give up hope that our friendship (a generous use of the word I'll admit) would continue, but needing to give up hope to receive the contact.
Well let me tell you, I was wrong. The last time I heard from her was months ago. I thought that I would go see her perform in Vancouver but I don't know if her concert was canceled or if I imagined it, I can find no news on a concert in Vancouver anytime soon. Her myspace page is gone, I've lost all contact and subsequently all hope. Despite this I've received no word from Ms. Gomyo.
Today for whatever reason, maybe I lied to myself when I said that I've given up hope, I did a search for her on facebook. I did this shortly after she deleted her myspace page but she wasn't there. Today however, I find her. So now I've the dilemma, do I contact her or not? (this question doesn't have to be rhetorical.)